A long time ago, in a swamp far, far away...
It was a horrible, stormy day...
Shrek: *walks out of his house* Ahhh! What a wonderful day in mah swamp
Shrek (peace be upon him) decided today would be a great day to go out
Shrek: I'm gonna go get me some pusseh!
Shrek walked into the village, distraught villagers began running away from him for their lives
Shrek: *walks up to the village's 7-11* Hmmm... this looks like a nice place to find me some bitches!
Shrek: *walks in* WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MAH SWAMP!
Noah: Welcome to 7-11!
Shrek walked up to the counter
Shrek: Alright enough chit chat! Bend over!
Noah: Can I recommend the donuts?
Shrek: I SAID BEND OVER YOU SLUT!
Noah: We also have very good hot doggies atm
Shrek BEND OVER!
Shrek: Alright you're going the right way for a smacked bottom!
Noah: *jumps over the counter and hangs off Shrek's sexy ears* ALULULULULULULU!
Shrek: Argh! *grabs Noah and absorbs him*
Shrek: Better in than out I always say...
Noah: *from inside Shrek* ALULULULULU
Shrek: Argh! Keep it down in there!
Shrek: BE QUIET!
Shrek: THAT'S IT! *runs back to his swamp*
Shrek: *goes into the outhouse and shits Noah out down the toilet* NOW STAY OUT!
Noah: Thank you come again!
Shrek: *flushes* That'll do Noah, that'll do... *sighs with relief*
Zoey: *Bursts through the outhouse door* Shrek! Fuck me you dirty slut!
Shrek: WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MAH SWAMP!
TO BE CONTINUED!